Inspired By Bloom.... not Wilt
This entry was inspired by Kak Nura J about her tutees who currently doing well in school and her experienced with Nyla's results.
You know my life wasn't always a bed of roses, I had so many struggles that I almost forgotten how it was to struggle any more. Every day is like a go-getter for me now just striving and working hard for my family thats is how I know and remember.
I previously had to bring up Pikachu aka Fiqa single handed, it was just us and against the world. While she was growing up and I finding myself, I was always pressured to do well in life coz I wanted to get rid of the stereotype of being labelled as JXXXX I hate that term, so much negativity in it.
So anyway I too felt the pressure when Fiqa entered P1 but during this time she was progressing well.
And during P2 her form teacher was a little weird (or that's what I felt, coz she feedback the same thing to other parents) she kept saying that her maths was not doing well.... I was confused and thinking of what the teacher told me kept ringing in my mind I was worried and I went out scouting for a tuition class for her. This part, the pressure for that perfect marks just mounted! Told myself to get a tuition teacher ASAP.
But some how I couldn't manage to get a tuition class nearby my place instead all tuition class was either full or schedule was clashing with her school. This is what I called blessing in disguise, so I told myself I gotta do this teaching MYSELF! Can you believe it?! I was her maths teacher at home I would everyday rush home (this part some of friends don't understand why I had no time to social, anak punya pasal I sacrifices everything) and check her homework, go through her homeworks with her. Extra hours was spending on doing assessments. She get tired and I get frustrated and tired too.
At the same time Fiqa discovered her talent in art, she was always doing art to express her feeling and there was once a she drew a black picture with an angry face to express her anger at me, I was so sad more like the feeling of being a failed mother. heart crushed! Wah cannot imagine to go through that again, don't want! At that stage I stop myself, I told her I was sorry and explained the reason why I wanted her to do well in school. We had a heart to heart talk and I am glad she understand and till now she know the exact reason why I wanted the best for her.
I felt so lousy and think hard..... I remembered mum always like to say this "Life tak boleh selalu perfect, kalau perfect semua tak boleh" and it struck me that I should released the kite a little bit to let it fly higher.
From that day onwards I told myself not to pressure and stress out, reminded myself that she is just a kid. And encourage her was the only way to go in order for her to love maths. From that day onwards, everything went "semua boleh" no pressure setting aside time to study, do art, watch tv and play with friends. Encourage her to be more excited with maths and incoporating maths into the things we do daily.
This year her mid year exam result came in, I was little nervous but I came home with an excited news that she was on top of her class and was selected to join the Maths Olympiad Training!!! I went like wow! when did this happen?? I almost couldn't believe it. Excitement and feeling proud!
From then onwards, she can actually do her homework her self, she was independently doing her maths. And interesting enough she always action la "alah this one senang you know in class everyone cannot answer but I can than teacher said I so good" and she give me the action face la of course kan.
As usual words of encouragement will come out and she felt so good and was beaming each time she did well. Just like Nyla, Fiqa also told me she will try to do well. Not perfect score la but better than previous marks.
So now blooming process is doing well, we are both happy! Now year end exams are coming up! Next week, I hope I don't fall into pressure she said everything is good so I'll just monitor her revision time and insyallah with hard work and a doa she will do well just like mid year.
And Fiqa if you are reading this one day, I am proud of you no matter what happen. Coz you are always and forever be my baby.
Love,
Your cool Ibu.
You know my life wasn't always a bed of roses, I had so many struggles that I almost forgotten how it was to struggle any more. Every day is like a go-getter for me now just striving and working hard for my family thats is how I know and remember.
I previously had to bring up Pikachu aka Fiqa single handed, it was just us and against the world. While she was growing up and I finding myself, I was always pressured to do well in life coz I wanted to get rid of the stereotype of being labelled as JXXXX I hate that term, so much negativity in it.
So anyway I too felt the pressure when Fiqa entered P1 but during this time she was progressing well.
And during P2 her form teacher was a little weird (or that's what I felt, coz she feedback the same thing to other parents) she kept saying that her maths was not doing well.... I was confused and thinking of what the teacher told me kept ringing in my mind I was worried and I went out scouting for a tuition class for her. This part, the pressure for that perfect marks just mounted! Told myself to get a tuition teacher ASAP.
But some how I couldn't manage to get a tuition class nearby my place instead all tuition class was either full or schedule was clashing with her school. This is what I called blessing in disguise, so I told myself I gotta do this teaching MYSELF! Can you believe it?! I was her maths teacher at home I would everyday rush home (this part some of friends don't understand why I had no time to social, anak punya pasal I sacrifices everything) and check her homework, go through her homeworks with her. Extra hours was spending on doing assessments. She get tired and I get frustrated and tired too.
At the same time Fiqa discovered her talent in art, she was always doing art to express her feeling and there was once a she drew a black picture with an angry face to express her anger at me, I was so sad more like the feeling of being a failed mother. heart crushed! Wah cannot imagine to go through that again, don't want! At that stage I stop myself, I told her I was sorry and explained the reason why I wanted her to do well in school. We had a heart to heart talk and I am glad she understand and till now she know the exact reason why I wanted the best for her.
I felt so lousy and think hard..... I remembered mum always like to say this "Life tak boleh selalu perfect, kalau perfect semua tak boleh" and it struck me that I should released the kite a little bit to let it fly higher.
From that day onwards I told myself not to pressure and stress out, reminded myself that she is just a kid. And encourage her was the only way to go in order for her to love maths. From that day onwards, everything went "semua boleh" no pressure setting aside time to study, do art, watch tv and play with friends. Encourage her to be more excited with maths and incoporating maths into the things we do daily.
This year her mid year exam result came in, I was little nervous but I came home with an excited news that she was on top of her class and was selected to join the Maths Olympiad Training!!! I went like wow! when did this happen?? I almost couldn't believe it. Excitement and feeling proud!
From then onwards, she can actually do her homework her self, she was independently doing her maths. And interesting enough she always action la "alah this one senang you know in class everyone cannot answer but I can than teacher said I so good" and she give me the action face la of course kan.
As usual words of encouragement will come out and she felt so good and was beaming each time she did well. Just like Nyla, Fiqa also told me she will try to do well. Not perfect score la but better than previous marks.
So now blooming process is doing well, we are both happy! Now year end exams are coming up! Next week, I hope I don't fall into pressure she said everything is good so I'll just monitor her revision time and insyallah with hard work and a doa she will do well just like mid year.
And Fiqa if you are reading this one day, I am proud of you no matter what happen. Coz you are always and forever be my baby.
Love,
Your cool Ibu.
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